A new outlook now in a much more supportive environment, got much more time to think the magic of getting a group of people to perform and deliver on planned goals. In short, life just got real and my convenient crutches has also been taken away.
I am sure that some of us have sought the safe harbour of unable to perform due to something I cannot control before in our lives. What if that is no longer there ? You are just left with the goal in front of you and how to plan to get there. Unmovable objects are most of the time crutches or excuses why we cannot do something. Without it then life becomes just that little bit more scarier as you have nothing left to blame.
It's scary and humbling knowing that what ever lies ahead, you got nothing and no one to blame except yourself. Internally, I have reached the point where I can no longer give a good answer what is wrong with what I am doing now, and what is blocking me from trying to achieve my mission or what I want to do. I am at crossroads. Each crossroads comes with their own hard set of questions. Here are some of the hard questions that I am going to have to find answers to:
- It's easy to throw up your hands and say I cannot proceed because this huge roadblock in the form of company procedures, my boss not giving me chances which has been laid in front of my way is preventing me from going forward. It's harder and more uncomfortable to find out why you supported best laid plans just went awry and you fell flat on your face.
- How to put all the stuff that I have read and want to try (organisations, software methodologies) into small measurable experiments to see over time if it's achieving what I originally planned.
- Related to the second point, now the chances are here swirling around in this huge cloud of opportunity, how then do I inject a bit of structure into the chaos to capture the lightning and harness the electricity. Lightnings are good and powerful but a battery or an electric socket is more predictable and productive value that can be used by others.
- Not getting lost in the woods and loosing sight of the trees. I have to really get better at recognising what is impactful and can bring the best value contrasted with what is enjoyable to do or interesting to do. After so many years, I have yet to find a good system to do this.